
How about being in a relationship where you constantly give yourself a second-guess? Or question your well-being every time you have a heated argument with your partner? It feels as if you are being manipulated in such a manner that you start doubting yourself, your actions, your capabilities, and even your sanity. These situations seem like gaslighting, a relationship buzzword of recent times. If you are facing any such happenings in your love life, then do not ignore them or take them lightly; it is just another form of emotional abuse. With this article, know what it is, the signs of gaslighting, and how you can deal with it:
Gaslighting is a psychologically manipulative technique and control wherein an individual makes the victim believe that it's not the way they think it to be. It's like making them question what they do, how they act, and understand, their memories and sanity levels.
It is mostly observed in relationships where one partner has power over another. It often starts with the individual telling small lies to the victim and making them feel confused. With time, they convince the victim that it is them who remembers it all wrong in their head, and then do things incorrectly. The victim is fully convinced that they are the one who is not able to make any judgment, and is being dishonest.
Gaslighting can be easily visible when you are always at loggerheads with yourself. If you find your partner behaving in these particular ways more than often, then these are signs. It can be:
Make you believe what you never said or did
Blame and criticize you whenever you take your stance or stay firm on your ground
Tries to trivialize or undervalue you and your capabilities
Form stories in another way, just to make you question them
Making you doubt your worth, hurting your self-esteem
If you are gaslighted, then you will find yourself doing some of these things:
Feeling anxious and depressed more than usual
Questioning yourself and your actions
Low self-esteem and confidence
Constantly feeling hopeless and numb
Being apologetic about your actions every time
Being out of control or not being in sync with reality
Just a little change, and you can put an end to it before it hurts you, erodes your self-esteem, and lets you lose your trust. Here is what you can do:
Confront them without any hesitation or fear.
Get out of such a relationship as soon as you can. Seek help from your friends and loved ones or a professional if needed.
Be sure of yourself, your capabilities, and feelings.
Set boundaries for yourself
Be aware of gaslighting tactics used by others, so that you do not let it happen again
Yes, it might have taken over your confidence and worth before you realized it was manipulative enough to be called love. But when you do, take time for yourself. And try developing enough connection with yourself, so that you never question your feelings or doing. Be sure and be safe!